Hardwired for Happiness

According to Dr. Joe Dispenza in this lecture, 95% of who we are by the time we are 35 is a memorized set of behaviors, a pattern of emotional reactions, continual unconscious habits, hardwired attitudes, rigid beliefs and perceptions.
We become very predictable people.
If we decide that perhaps we want something better, perhaps change in our lifes, we must start with our thoughts.

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If you agree and believe that the way you think has some effect on you life, than changing the way you think is the only real solution for transformation.

In order to become better versions of who we are for a better life, we must change our personalities.

Terri Duan

How Our Personalities Are Formed

We have around 60,000 to 70,000 thoughts per day. That’s an average of 2500 – 3,300 thoughts per hour. Out of those 60-70 thousand thoughts that you think, 90% of those thoughts are the same thoughts as the day before.

If you believe (like I do) that your thoughts are some how connected to your life, then the same thoughts always lead to the same choices, which eventually lead to the same outcomes.

Thoughts for Change

Since the same choices always lead to the same behaviors, the same behaviors create the same experiences.

The same experiences produce the same emotions.

Those very same emotions drive those very same thoughts.

A vicious circle and a predictable life.

Your thoughts, fueled by emotions effect your entire life, including your biology, your neurocircuitry, your neurochemistry, your neurohormones, and even your genetic expression. It is all equal to how you think, how you act and how you feel.

How you think, how you act and how you feel is called your personality and your personality creates your personal reality.

Art by Robert Jahns

 

navigating life

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Feeling lost? Remember, each moment is an opportunity to change our course and see the world with a new improved outlook and with more purpose, commitment and intention.

My rule.  If I don’t feel it, I don’t do it.

Ponder this –

If you have nothing to stir you up and rouse you into action, nothing will test your resolution but its threats and hostilities; if you recline in unshaken comfort, it is not tranquillity; it is merely a flat calm.

Begin again, do what moves you.

More insight  By Lucius Annaeus Seneca – Letters from a Stoic (Penguin Classics) (6/30/69)

 

 

be here now

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There is only one place to be. Here and now.

Why do our brains stubbornly insist on projecting us into the future when there is so much stuff to think about right here today? Why not be here now and there then?

The fact is that human beings come into the world with a passion for control, they go out of the world the same way, and research suggests that if they lose their ability to control things at any point between their entrance and their exit, they become unhappy, helpless, hopeless and depressed.  Read more Stumbling on Happiness by Daniel Gilbert

Which reminds me of a beautiful poem about radically accepting this moment.

There is no controlling life.

Try corralling a lightening bolt or containing a a tornado.

Dam a stream and it will create a new channel.

Resist and the tide will sweep you off your feet.

Allow, and grace will carry you to higher ground.

Allow by Danna Faulds
Go In and In: Poems From the Heart of Yoga

Photography  – Clark Little www.clarklittle.com

the wisdom of your body, keystone habits and the side (lateral) lunge

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I workout every day because I am reminded that past performance is not an indicator of future results. What I do today will determine what my tomorrow(s) will be. Workout wisdom has it that you should never miss more than three days in a row or it’s really difficult to get back in the habit. I say, never miss a day.

Keystone Habits

Daily exercise has become a critical ritual for me because a.workouts are a keystone habit and b.  I sit way too much and sitting for too long each day can have serious side effects on my health.
Sitting Kills, Moving Heals: How Everyday Movement Will Prevent Pain, Illness, and Early Death — and Exercise Alone Won’t

Movement & the Mind

Movement also helps me mentally, maybe even in more impactful ways than I know. A great workout helps clear my brain and keep the worry and anxiety at bay.

Although I am a member of three gyms, take spin and dance classes and I am looking into downloading Class Pass to try new workouts, I train outdoors as much as I can.

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Today’s work out included biking along the beach (2.5 miles) to and from the gym, 30 minutes (hard) on the eliptical, High Intensive Interval Training training for 15 mins at the lacrosse field adding side lateral lunges as recommended by my daughter @lanathecowboy on Instagram and then a swim back at the beach.

Our body’s are so intelligent. This morning I read a beautiful essay from John O’Donghue’s
Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom

The body is also very truthful. You know from your own life that your body rarely lies. Your mind can deceive you and put all kinds of barriers between you and the truth; but your body does not lie. Your body tells you, if you attend to it, how your life is and whether you are living from your soul or from the labyrinths of your negativity. The body also has a wonderful intelligence. All of our movements, indeed everything we do, demands the most refined and detailed cooperation of each of our senses. The human body is the most complex, refined and harmonious totality.

 

 

daily gratitude

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First I remember, I am not entitled to this life. This morning, like every morning (and each and every moment in-between) is a true gift and I receive it with arms wide open.

The daily practice of appreciation

One of the most helpful  rituals I practice every morning is upon waking up, no matter what is on my mind – worry, fear, anxiety about the day; I quickly redirect my thoughts to write down precisely what I am grateful for, so I can recall the abundance I already have. Sure there are plenty of problems to face today, but these are first world problems. With gratitude, I can handle them. It’s a privilege to have these problems. Yes, I get to do this today. I’m given the opportunity to work through these problems today. Thank you.

Beginning each day with gratitude elevates my level of happiness and peace of mind; allowing me to focus on the greatness of my life and all that I already have. A deep appreciation for where I am right now that empowers me and inspires me to awaken to this very moment and this amazing new day.

It is so simple, so mood altering and elevating. In order to feel truly grateful, I choose to recall all of the incredible blessings that I have right now, including my family, my friends and my hopes, dreams and aspirations.

“This a wonderful day. I’ve never seen this one before.” Maya Angelou

out of the mouths of babes

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Much of the noise on our planet is made by one species: Humanity.  What do other people unconsciously hear and feel when they hear me (you) speak?  What are the cross modal effects of my (your) communication with others?  From the feedback of my frustrating failed efforts to get my point across (not always, but often and mostly about very important subjects with people who mean so much to me), I realize that I must focus on transforming my tone. Wait, not just my tone, but my register, timbre, prosody, pace, pitch and volume.

The goal – to develop a more authentic voice while finding the courage to communicate more purposely and compassionately. To develop a more powerful and expressive voice and ability to listen while ultimately creating healthier relationships. I think of it as taking the tightness and toughness out of my talk.

The act of tuning in and turning ON a softer, more encouraging voice, will begin to turn my speech into my truth. My voice and words should empower those around me, not make them angry and defensive.

The objective is to take the anger and pain out of circulation, which in turn will help to heal.

Imagine creating sound consciously and consuming sound consciously and designing all of our environments consciously for sound. Designing a world where understanding would become the norm.

Watching & Learning

Julian Treasure “How to Speak So People Listen” Ted Talks

utopia

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If you think about it, an enormous amount of damage is created by the myth of utopia. There is an intrinsic feeling in nearly every person that your life could be perfect if you only had such-and-such a car or such-and-such a spouse or such-and-such a job.  We believe we will be made whole by our accomplishments, our possessions, or our social status. It’s written in the fabric of our DNA that life used to be beautiful and now it isn’t, and if only this and if only that, it would be beautiful again.

The human story goes on.

Read more

A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: How I Learned to Live a Better Story

Image from Cornell University

how to be

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Often we devote our primary attention to the facts of our lives, to the situation at hand, to our work and status. Most of our energy goes into doing.  Many people wonder where they should be and what they should do, when in fact they should be more concerned about how to be.

We can control only what we do and say, what choices we make, what words we say. The rest is up to fate. And so life has positive and negative turns. And rarely do you see them coming.

Read
A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I Learned While Editing My Life by Donald Miller 1st (first) Edition [Hardcover(2009)]

Study
Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom

timeless presence

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As difficult and dark as life might get, I stay awake and aware of the impermanence of all things and remain in this moment, seeking refuge in compassionate and forgiving timeless presence.

Listen Tara Brach Tara Brach Audio Dharma Teaching Talks

limitless (Danna Faulds)

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Sun says, “Be your own illumination.”

Wren says, “Sing your heart out, all day long.”

Stream says, “Do not stop for any obstacle.”

Oak says, “When the wind blows, bend easily, and trust your roots to hold.”

Stars say, “What you see is one small slice of a single modest galaxy. Remember that vastness cannot be grasped by mind.”

Ant says, “Small does not mean powerless.”

Silence says nothing. In the quiet everything comes clear.

I say, “Limitless.” I say, “Yes.”

Limitless: New Poems and Other Writings by Danna Faulds