How to Know What’s True

Weed out the lies in your life, so that new truths may grow. By Madeline Johnson

and-every-day-the-world-will-drag-you-by-the-19483462

Pity our egos – lost and directionless with no access to reality.

Everything experienced through our hopes, dreams and aspirations – through our perception.

And anything that does not meet our expectations, is so difficult to accept.

This is because we wrestle with releasing our ignorance and expectations.

We become so identified with our illusions that we forget who we are and what is real.

more.png

The truth is essential even when you don’t like what you hear.

Honor your life. Accept it as it is. Today, and right now.

Do this so that the honest and decent moments you are waiting for don’t pass you by.

Work with what you have.

Truth and acceptance make for a great foundation in reality – the ideal soil for new possibilities and  beginnings.

Weed out the lies in your life, so that new truths may grow.

Featured Artwork

Indg0

One Very Smart Habit

Staying focused on what is important to you. This is a very good habit to start. By Madeline Johnson

I’ve gotten into the very good habit lately of asking myself throughout the day if I am focused on what is really important.

This habit is easy to learn.

I simply stop what I am doing, take a breath and then ask myself the question.

Am I focused on what’s most important right now?

Most of the time I find that I am not focused on what is important. I find myself getting milked by another on the phone, distracted by text messages or simply on autopilot working through the day.

Yet I know that I can catch myself.  So, If I find that I am concentrating on something that isn’t in line with what is important, I reset and start again. It feels like one long ride of falling and getting up again, but I know that training my mind over and over again will eventually let it sink in.

Staying focused on what is important to you. It is a very good habit to start.

listen

 

Train yourself to listen to your heart so that you know what’s true and important, and what is not.

2.png

buddha

 

Featured Art

@Rogerscate on Instagram

 

 

Needs vs Desires

In the words of Osho, desire is need gone mad. By Madeline Johnson

I haven’t read Osho’s book When The Shoe Fits yet, but I think I might.  If you have read it, I would love to hear your thoughts, negative, positive or neutral.

I have always been interested in Taoism but absolutely confused and overwhelmed by the cryptic meanings.

Read: A Riddle on the Essence of Wisdom

It’s statements like
“The Tao never does anything, yet through it, all things are done.” 

Huh?

Taoism is more than just a “philosophy” or a “religion”. Taoism is more like a system of beliefs, attitudes, and practices.

Some claim that the path of understanding Taoism is simply accepting oneself. Live life and discover who you are. Your nature is ever changing and is always the same. Don’t try to resolve the various contradictions in life, instead learn acceptance of your nature.

I haven’t read any of the Tao te Ching, but it was Osho’s description of needs versus desires that really resonated with me today.

1

Featured Artist

Taiji Taomote

Living Your Life On Purpose

There is no greater feeling of accomplishment than knowing you have a purpose- knowing that you are making a difference – by Madeline Johnson

There is no greater feeling of accomplishment than knowing you have a purpose- knowing that you are making a difference – knowing that you are contributing to something that is good.

clarify-your-purpose-what-is-the-why-behind-everything-you-do-when-we-know-this-in-life-or-design-quote-1

There is just too much emphasis today on “finding your purpose” and not enough encouragement to live a life filled with intention. There is a difference between finding one’s purpose and living daily with intention. Today I am thinking about how one can find their purpose when they decide to live their lives like everything is on purpose.

c

Everything you do, can be done with more intention and with more purpose. Finding your purpose does not have to be a huge wrestle with wonder and worry.

Discovering your purpose does not have to lead to endless self-reflection and a struggle to uncover your true passion.

You can start right here, right now and ask yourself one simple question – What is the purpose of what I am doing right now? This one question helps to breathe new meaning into your life.

d

What is the purpose of sitting down and writing this post? 

The purpose of this post is to share a bit of wisdom  about what it means to live with purpose. This is my contribution to the world today.

What is the purpose of my morning routine?

The purpose of eating a healthy breakfast and going to the gym this morning is to keep my mind and body strong.

What is the purpose of my work?

The purpose of my work today is to help others growth their businesses and build their dreams.

And so forth. . .

Everything I do must have a purpose, or I simply won’t do it. Even wasting some time watching Netflix or surfing through YouTube has a purpose for me. The purpose might be two fold – the taking a moment to relax and discovering something new that interests me.

I believe that once you start asking yourself why you do what you do, you begin to live with more intention. This “why” question also helps you understand more about yourself and in turn makes you more self aware and connected to your life purpose.

2.png

Read:  Think Straight by Darius Foroux

Artwork

The Moon Tower Party on Instagram

The Art of Thinking Critically, Logically & Magically

There is what exists (reality).
There is what we perceive it to be. And then there is the many undeniable variations of the truth. By Madeline Johnson

I am passionately interested in learning how we can improve our thinking so we can better understand what is true.

Improving the way we think about life so that we can communicate our ideas more clearly and confidently and identify information that is a result of sloppy, biased, misinformed thinking.

There is what exists (reality)

There is what we perceive it to be

(what we wish, want and believe to be true)

and then there is the many undeniable

variations of the truth.

For the truth isn’t a one-size fits all option.

3

Subjective truth is what is true about your experience of the world. How you feel when you see the color blue, what chocolate tastes like to you, what it’s like being with your family, all these are your experiences and yours alone. They are your personal truths.

I am interested in how we might bridge the gap between these personal truths, our perceptions about life and bring them closer together with deductive and inductive truths, to navigate our lives with a better map.

1

How might we begin? With acceptance. Acceptance of uncertainty. A fundamental skill for everyone is the ability to accept large amounts of uncertainty. In an ever-changing world, nothing is ever certain.

Here, four good arguments about doing just that. On Quora “How You Can Bridge The Gap Between Perception & Reality?”

Screen Shot 2019-02-17 at 8.52.02 AM.png

 

Where Logic & Critical Thinking Fits in to the Truth

Logic is the science of how to evaluate arguments and reasoning. How to decimate what is false from true.  Critical thinking is a process of evaluation that uses logic to separate truth from falsehood, and reasonable from unreasonable beliefs.

If you want to better evaluate the various claims, ideas, and arguments you encounter, you need a better understanding of basic logic and the process of critical thinking.

Introduction to Critical Thinking

By developing your critical thinking skills you learn to evaluate information that you hear and process information that you collect while recognizing your implicit biases.

Characteristics of Critical Thinking

To become a critical thinker, you must develop a few skills.

  • Recognize assumptions you carry with you. Have you ever wondered why you believe the things that you believe? Do you believe things because you’ve been told to believe them? Step outside your own beliefs to observe from a neutral viewpoint. Be aware of assumptions and learn to self-reflect.

 

  • Process information honestly. People sometimes pass along information that is not really true (i.e. the “fake news” crisis).

 

  • Recognize a generalization. Girls don’t like bugs. Old people are wise. Cats make better pets. These are generalizations. They’re not always true, are they?

 

  • Evaluate old information and new ideas. There was a time when doctors thought leeches could cure us. Recognize that just because something is commonly accepted, doesn’t mean it is true.

 

  • Produce new ideas based on sound evidence. Detectives solve crimes by collecting bits of truths and putting them all together like a puzzle. One small deceit can jeopardize an investigation. The entire truth-seeking process is destabilized by one piece of bad evidence, leading to a wrong conclusion.

 

  • Analyze a problem and recognize the complex parts. A mechanic must understand how an entire engine works before s/he can diagnose a problem. Sometimes it is necessary to deconstruct an engine to figure out which part isn’t working. You should approach big problems like this: break them down into smaller parts and observe carefully and deliberately.

 

  • Use precise vocabulary and communicate with clarity. The truth can be blurred by fuzzy language. It is important to develop your vocabulary so you can communicate truths accurately.

 

  • Manage emotions in response to a situation or problem. Don’t be fooled by stirred up, emotional plea or angry speech. Stay rational and keep your emotions in check as you encounter new information.
  • Judge your sources. Learn to recognize hidden agendas and bias when you collect information.

Daily Practices to improve your logical thinking

  1. Don’t accept just anything as true, which you do not clearly know to be such; that is, avoid hasty judgments and prejudice will prevent jumping the gun.  It requires a disciplined mind.
  2. Divide each difficulty under examination into as many parts as possible, or into as many as necessary for the solution of the problem. Most problems are combinations of problems and this failure to understand such will lead to jumping to conclusion.
  3. Begin with the things that are simplest and easiest to understand, and then ascend to knowledge of the more complex.
  4. Make enumerations so complete, and reviews so comprehensive, that you may be assured that nothing is omitted.
  5. Draw out in tables or lists of what you know, and that which is wrong.  If Boolean algebra is needed make, your truth tables of items. Make flow charts of the problem(s).
  6. The answer is in the details. Study each part as itself and then as a whole.
  7. Ask yourself this: “Is it logical, illogical, or nonlogical? Nonlogical does not mean illogical. Nonlogical is a statement like “I like to travel,” or “I love you” (showing emotion or opinions) are ordinarily regarded as non-argumentative and do not require supporting evidence since it solely is in the head of the person making the statement.  Illogical is one, which violates the rules of sound reasoning (like added 2 plus 2 and getting 5).
  8. Do not use All, Always, Never, forever, Not ever, as they lead to false conclusions by over simplifying and generalizing.
  9. The most simplest answer may or may not be the one.  If it truly is only one problem, then the simplest answer is most likely the correct one. If it is a series of problems, or more than one interconnecting problem, then it is no longer just simple.

Avoiding Logical Fallacies

Logical fallacies are flaws in reasoning that lead to illogical statements. Though logical fallacies tend to occur when ideas are being argued, they can be found in all types of writing. Most logical fallacies masquerade as reasonable statements, but they’re in fact attempts to manipulate readers by appealing to their emotions instead of their intellects, their hearts rather than their heads. The names by which logical fallacies are known indicate the way that thinking has gone wrong.

Hasty generalization

A hasty generalization draws conclusions from inadequate evidence. Suppose someone says, “My hometown is the best place in the state to live.” And the person gives only two examples to support the opinion. That’s not enough. And others might not feel the same way, perhaps for many reasons. Therefore, the person who makes such a statement is indulging in a hasty generalization. Stereotyping is another kind of hasty generalization. It happens, for example, when someone says, “Everyone from country X is dishonest.” Such a sweeping claim about all members of a particular ethnic, religious, racial, or political group is stereotyping. Yet another kind of stereotyping is sexism, which occurs when someone discriminates against another person based on gender. For example, when an observer of a minor traffic accident involving women makes negative comments about all “women drivers,” the person is guilty of a combination of stereotyping and sexism—both components of hasty generalization.

False analogy

A false analogy draws a comparison in which the differences outweigh the similarities or the similarities are irrelevant. For example, “Old Joe Smith would never make a good president because an old dog can’t learn new tricks” is a false analogy. Joe Smith isn’t a dog. Also, learning the role of a president cannot be compared to a dog’s learning tricks. Homespun analogies like this have an air of wisdom about them but tend to fall apart when examined closely.

Begging the question

Begging the question tries to offer proof by simply using another version of the argument itself. This is also called circular reasoning. For example, “Wrestling is a dangerous sport because it is unsafe” begs the question. Unsafe is a synonym for dangerous, so the statement goes around in a circle, getting nowhere. Evidence of the claimed danger is missing. Here’s another example with a different twist. “Wrestling is a dangerous sport because wrestlers get injured.” Here, the support fro the second part of the statement is the argument in the first part of the statement. Obviously, since wrestling is a popular sport, it can be safe when undertaken with proper training and practice. And here’s yet another example:  “Wrestlers love danger.” This time, the problem is the unstated assumption that wrestling’s supposed danger, not the sport, is what attracts wrestlers. Yet the audience can’t be assumed to share the opinion that wrestling is dangerous.

Irrelevant argument

An irrelevant argument reaches a conclusion that doesn’t follow from the premises. It’s also called a non sequitur (Latin for “it does not follow”). This happens when a conclusion doesn’t follow from the premises. Here’s an example: “Jane Jones is a forceful speaker, so she’ll make a good mayor.” What does speaking ability have to do with being a good mayor?

False cause

A false cause assumes that because two events are related in time, the first caused the second. It’s also known as post hoc, ergo propter hoc (Latin for “after this, therefore because of this”) or the Butterfly effect. For example, if someone claims that a new weather satellite launched last week has caused the rain that’s been falling ever since, that person is connecting two events that have no causal relationship to each other.  One must be careful that the two are connected. Cause and Effect can lead to the ripple effect though.  When many events are related and can be traced back to each other much like the “to build a mousetrap game.” This is a major cause of jumping to a conclusion for many that do not carefully look at the outcome and logically reason out the problem.

Self-contradiction

Self-contradiction uses two premises that can’t both be true at the same time. Here’s an example: “Only when nuclear weapons have finally destroyed us will we be  convinced of the need to control them.” This is self-contradictory because no one would be around to be convinced if everyone had been destroyed.

Red herring

A red herring tries to distract attention from one issue by introducing a second that is unrelated to the first.  It’s sometimes call ignoring the question. Here’s an example: “Why worry about pandas becoming extinct when we haven’t solved the plight of the homeless?” What do homeless people have to do with pandas? If the point is that money spent to prevent the extinction of pandas should do to the homeless, then that’s what should be said. By using an irrelevant issue, a person hopes to distract that audience, just as putting a herring in the path of a bloodhound would distract if from the scent it has been told to follow. This is very big in the political arena.

Argument to the person

An argument to the person means attacking the person making the argument rather than the argument itself. It’s also know as the ad hominem or ad homunem (Latin for “to the man”) attack.  When a person’s appearance, habits, or character is criticized instead of the merits of that person’s argument, the attack is a fallacy. Here’s an example:  “We’d take her position on child abuse seriously if she were not so nasty to her husband.” What does nastiness to an adult, though it isn’t nice, have to do with child abuse? Most people when losing a debate do this “You always think you are right, but you are not!”

Guilt by association

Guilt by association means that a person’s arguments, ideas, or opinions lack merit because of that person’s activities, interests, or companions. For example, here’s the fallacy in operation:  “Jack belongs to the International Hill Climbers Association, which declared bankruptcy last month. This makes him unfit to be mayor of our city.” The fact that the group that declared bankruptcy and has Jack as a member has nothing to do with his ability to be the mayor.

Jumping on the bandwagon

Jumping on the bandwagon means something is right or permissible because “everyone does it.” It’s also called ad popilim (Latin for “to the people”). This fallacy operates in statements such as “How could smoking be unhealthy if million so people smoke?” Just because one can do something doesn’t make it right to do. Also done as justification of actions.

False or irrelevant authority

Using false or irrelevant authority means citing the opinion of someone who has no expertise in the subject at hand. This fallacy attempts to transfer prestige from one area to another. Many television commercials rely on this tactic—a famous tennis player praising a brand of motor oil or a popular movie start lauding a brand of cheese.

Card-stacking

Card-stacking ignores evidence of the other side of the questions. It’s also know as special pleading. From all the available facts, only those that will build the best (or worst) possible case are used. Many television commercials use this strategy. When three slim, happy consumers praise a diet plan, only at the very end of the ad does the announcer—in a very low and speedy voice—say that results vary and even that language seems to have been chosen to be vague and non-informative.

The either-or fallacy

The either-or fallacy offers only two alternatives when more exist. This fallacy is also called false dilemma. Such fallacies tend to touch on emotional issues and can therefore seem accurate until analyzed. For example, “Either go to college or forget about getting a job” is an example of an either-or fallacy. Obviously, many jobs don’t require a college education.

Taking something out of context

            Taking something out of context deliberately distorts an idea or a fact by removing it from its previously surrounding material. For example, suppose that a newspaper movie critic writes, “The plot was predictable and boring, but the music was sparkling.” And the next day an ad for the movie claims “critics cal it ‘sparkling.’” This is an example of the critic’s words having been taken out of context thereby a distortion of the original.

Appeal to ignorance

            Appeal to ignorance ties to make an incorrect argument based on its never having been shown to be false—or, the reverse, an incorrect argument based on its not yet having been proven true. Such appeals can be very persuasive because they prey on people’s superstitions or lack of knowledge. Such appeals are often stated in the fuzzy language of double negatives. Here’s an example:  “Because it hasn’t been proven that eating food X does not cause cancer, we can assume that is does.” In truth, the absence of opposing evidence proves nothing. Telling half the story or giving half the information, then drawing a conclusion from that.

Ambiguity and equivocation

            Ambiguity and equivocation are statements that can be interpreted in more than one way, thus concealing the truth. For example, suppose a person is asked, “Is she doing a good job?” and the person answers with “She’s performing as expected.” Such an answer is open to positive or negative interpretation. A similar example of this fallacy is when the question “Have you made any progress?” is answered by “We’ve held some meetings.” Most who do this answer with nonspecific answers, never directly answering the question at hand. Avoidance is the key to identifying this.

This is a reposting from Recognizing and Avoiding Logical Fantasies

You can find over 300 logical fallacies here at Logically Fallacious

Einstein-Imagination.png

 

Featured Artwork

Vivian Pantoja

Manifesting Your Reality

Don’t waste your thoughts worrying. Don’t give away your thoughts and don’t waste time thinking about what you don’t want to happen. By Madeline Johnson

Your thoughts have the power to change everything in your life. Everything you have in your life right now, started with a thought.

bcf271ff4c942349e93ed608213b2783

What you focus on with your thoughts, your mind will manifest as reality.

Sometimes our thoughts create realities that we have to overcome.

energy-follows-thought-no-matter-how-hard-we-work-or-how-much-we-know-we-tend-to-rise-to-our-quote-1

Every single thought we have is a unit of energy. Energy to create something new.

Don’t waste your thoughts worrying. Don’t give away your thoughts and don’t waste time thinking about what you don’t want to happen.

worrying

Invest in thoughts that are productive.

The next time you start obsessing about something, ask yourself . . .

Is this thought going to enhance my life

or take away from it?

2.png

Place your thoughts and energy behind that which will make you stronger, rather than wasting your thoughts on remorse about things that have fallen apart.

Conserve your thought energy to create more beauty, rather than manifest more pain.

The moment you change your perception is the moment you rewrite the chemistry of your body.   Dr. Bruce Lipton, author of The Biology of Belief

3.png

Recommended Reading

Way of The Peaceful Warrior, Dan Millman

Featured Artist

@demoontier makes weird, queer, drag and fashion inspired art.

https://www.instagram.com/demoontier/

 

 

The Freedom To Continually Reinvent Yourself

22The-greatest-danger-for-most-of-us-is-not-that-we-aim-too-high-and-we-miss-it-but-we-aim-too-low-and-reach-it.22-Michelangelo

We overwhelm ourselves with huge, stupid, anxious questions. For example. . .

What should I do with my life? 

Now that is a terrible, awful question.

What should I do with the next 5 minutes of my life? is a much better one.

There is so much opportunity in the small moments of each day.

Connecting With The Keeper of Things Wild

A passage from Clarissa Estes’ book

Do not cringe or make yourself small if you are called the black sheep, the maverick or the lone wolf. Only those with “slow seeing” say a non-conformist is a blight on society.

It has been proven over centuries that being “different” means standing on the edge. It means that one is practically guaranteed to make an original contribution, a useful and stunning contribution to our society and culture.

When seeking guidance, don’t ever listen to the tiny-hearted. Be kind to them, heap them with blessing, cajole them but do not follow their advice.

If you have ever been called defiant, incorrigible, forward, cunning, insurgent, unruly, rebellious, you are on the right track.

In a world where nobody really knows anything, you have the incredible freedom to continually reinvent yourself. Go forth, forge new paths, no matter how strange.

From Tribe of Mentors

From Where You Are to Where You Want to Be

A case and meditation for raising your vibration. Remember, attitude is everything.

We all have a state of consciousness that when we get to, things just happen effortlessly.  We perceive of the reality that is equal to the emotion we feel. You must believe it to see it.

A 21 day high-vibe meditation with Aaron Dougherty

 

giphy.gif

 

Estonia vs Ethiopia

While planning my next leg of travel, or what I refer to as my Cosmic AF World Tour, I realized that using Instagram as my only source of inspiration about where to visit next was a very bad idea. Coming to grips with my lack of geographical knowledge, I set out to discover more than the photos of turquoise shorelines and high peak mountains depicted in my feed.

Determined to learn about a new place and culture each day, I purchased a book that I am reading each morning to learn more about our world. Like, who knew Kiiking was an actual sport created in Estonia?

I quickly realized that I also needed to see more than the beautiful photos displayed on each page of coffee table books.  Using Local Guides Connect  with photos that are uploaded to Google maps (real photos by real people) in conjunction with The World, A Traveler’s Guide to the Planet has helped me make better decisions about where my next adventure might be.

 

Ego Trippers, Smiling Our Way Through Fear & The Life Long Importance of Relationships

happiness

When we remove ego, we’re left with what is real.ReadEgo is the Enemy, Ryan Holiday

egoisenemy

Redefining Our Identities with and without Psychedelics

Ego death, or as Jung called it, “psychic death,” is also called “ego loss.” It signifies the complete loss of subjective identity. In Jungian theory, this precedes a rebirth into a new identity. Timothy Leary coined the term “ego loss” in regard to LSD experiences. Ego death is the second stage In Joseph Campbell’s Hero’s Journey.  Ego death in Buddhism is related to understanding one’s true nature, (not mistaking the rope for the snake), which leads to a permanent awakening from ego fixation (one will never mistake the rope for the snake once it is seen to be a rope).

ego_quotes15

Psychotherapy and psychedelics both assist in helping redefine identity. Psychotherapy focuses on ego defenses and issues stemming from identification with the ego and its journey to wholeness, while ayahuasca can loosen the strict boundaries of self-perception and allow other information and perspectives in, introducing a new dimension of healing.

ego

 

quote-the-ego-however-is-not-who-you-really-are-the-ego-is-your-self-image-it-is-your-social-deepak-chopra-40-50-69

 

From Panic to Peace – Smiling Your Way Through Fear

Thich Nhat Hanh calls his practice of yes “smile yoga.” He suggests bringing a slight but real smile to our lips many times throughout the day, whether we are meditating or simply stopping for a red light. “A tiny bud of a smile on your lips,” writes Thich Nhat Hanh, “nourishes awareness and calms you miraculously. . . your smile will bring happiness to you and those around you.”

The power of a smile to open and relax us is confirmed by modern science. The muscles used to make a smile actually send a biochemical message to our nervous system that it is safe to relax the flight, fight or freeze response.  A smile is the yes of unconditional friendliness that welcomes experience without fear.

Smiling can be the trigger that switches us from operating under the power of the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight) to the parasympathetic nervous system (rest and digest). Our body is designed to be in the state of rest and digest most of the time, but there are too many stressful things in our life to keep our body to stay in the fight or flight mode.

stray_herring_by_mattiasa-d5gbwcc

Why is smiling important? Smiling not only offers a mood boost but helps our bodies release cortisol and endorphins that provide numerous health benefits, including:

  • Reduced blood pressure
  • Increased endurance
  • Reduced pain
  • Reduced stress
  • Strengthened immune system

Read

Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach

 

Good Genes are Nice, But Joy is Better

Robert Waldinger is a Zen priest and leader of the longest-running study of human happiness. He has found that science and Buddhism agree on what makes life happy and meaningful.

attention

Waldinger is also a clinical professor of psychiatry at Harvard University and director of the famed Harvard Study of Adult Development. It’s perhaps the longest-running study of adult life ever conducted. For seventy-five continuous years, it has tracked the lives of 724 men in order to understand what makes for a healthy, happy life. Now it’s following the next generation, as it tracks the lives of the original subjects’ children and their families.

Harvard study, almost 80 years old, has proved that embracing community helps us live longer, and be happier.

 

10321_itok=bG5fIcq5

Overcoming Distractions & That Overwhelming Feeling

Distractions keep us from focusing on our mission. If you don’t have a mission, that’s okay, think of your mission as anything you say that you really want to “focus” on if you had the time, the money, the resources. You know, your hopes, dreams, and aspirations.

ellar

Everything feels like a distraction at times, which can lead to feeling overwhelmed especially when distractions are inviting and enticing.

Do what Adam Robinson does. Ask yourself this question – my notes from Tribe of Mentors.

Where should I be focusing my attention right now?

Mission

 

Art by Russ Mills

https://byroglyphics.co.uk/

Do Today As You Would in The Future & Living a Life in Accordance with Your Values

future.jpg
People who are happiest and most content with their lives, know, without a doubt, that what they are doing right now and the friends they choose to connect with – are in complete alignment with what they truly value.
If you want your life to change for the better, the time to start living in accordance with what you value is right now.  And what you do now, will pretty much determine your future.
education

“For me, I am driven by two main philosophies: know more today about the world than I knew yesterday and lessen the suffering of others. You’d be surprised how far that gets you.”

Most of our frustration and suffering comes from not living in accordance with our values.
moral_compass_by_commanderofthedead-d5qtfpf
You see, if what I value is personal time and the freedom to make my own schedule and do my own thing at my own pace and suddenly I place myself in a relationship or situation where I am required to give up the time, I may feel trapped, held hostage, and/or unable to do what I want or need to do, I get very upset and angry.
What this looks like
It could be my parents (I really love them so)  who guilt me into thinking it is my responsibility to leave my life by the curb and my daily pleasures so that I take care of them for long periods at a time because they didn’t “plan” on falling ill. They assumed I would come to their rescue I guess.
It could be a client who wants me to put in more hours (again taking from my personal freedom to schedule my own day) then we agreed to or change our strategy in the middle of a project because the strategy they paid me to create isn’t working fast enough.
It could be a good friend who decides that I am not giving enough to our relationship, so I give more of my time even though I would rather be doing something else.
Anytime I and you am/are not living in accordance with what we most value we will hit a block, feel stuck, disappointed and frustrated. We are angry at ourselves for not staying true to what we really believe and our values and this in turn this leads to more pain and confusion.
Watch Teal Swan explain this so perfectly in her video The Secret to a Happy Life.
C1XP4N2XEAAZWXQ
Understanding our values will become easier when we know what we like, enjoy or want out of our lives and how we expect ourselves to go about it all. Our values are like our set of rules for engagement.

But How do You Develop Your Values?

Most of what you value came from what your parents told you that your should value.
expiru
That is until you grew up and realized that you could develop a whole new set of values and evaluate those values as you grow older.

A Beginner’s List of Values

  1. Abundance
  2. Acceptance
  3. Accomplishment
  4. Accountability
  5. Accuracy
  6. Achievement
  7. Acknowledgement
  8. Activeness
  9. Adaptability
  10. Adoration
  11. Adroitness
  12. Advancement
  13. Adventure
  14. Affection
  15. Affluence
  16. Aggressiveness
  17. Agility
  18. Alertness
  19. Altruism
  20. Amazement
  21. Ambition
  22. Amusement
  23. Anticipation
  24. Appreciation
  25. Approachability
  26. Approval
  27. Art
  28. Articulacy
  29. Artistry
  30. Assertiveness
  31. Assurance
  32. Attentiveness
  33. Attractiveness
  34. Audacity
  35. Authenticityto be genuinely yourself at all times. If you value your authenticity and you are in a position where you feel like you have to be someone you are not, you may become very frustrated and upset, because you are living against your core value of being 100% completely you. The same goes for if you are feeling unaccepted for who you are and what you stand for. If your friends or aquaintances disapprove of you, then you may be inclined to feel disappointed. To live an unapologetically authentic life while surrounding yourself around people who appreciate your uniqueness is extremely fulfilling. Find them. 
  36. Availability
  37. Awareness
  38. Awe
  39. Balance
  40. Beauty
  41. Being the best
  42. Belonging
  43. Benevolence
  44. Bliss
  45. Boldness
  46. Bravery
  47. Brilliance
  48. Buoyancy
  49. Calmness
  50. Camaraderie
  51. Candor
  52. Capability
  53. Careif showing genuine care and consideration in your relationships is something you believe to be very important than you will be hard pressed to find compatibility with someone who doesn’t demonstrate a warm, affectionate, tender and kind reciprocation back towards you.
  54. Carefulness
  55. Celebrity
  56. Certainty
  57. Challenge when one of your core values is to be continually challenged by a life of learning, growing and expanding your consciousness, it is difficult to associate with people who are content with staying the same. 
  58. Change
  59. Charity
  60. Charm
  61. Chastity
  62. Cheerfulness
  63. Clarity
  64. Cleanliness
  65. Clear-mindedness
  66. Cleverness
  67. Closeness
  68. Comfort
  69. Commitment
  70. Community
  71. Compassion
  72. Competence
  73. Competition
  74. Completion
  75. Composure
  76. Concentration
  77. Confidence
  78. Conformity
  79. Congruency
  80. Connection
  81. Consciousness
  82. Conservation
  83. Consistency
  84. Contentment
  85. Continuity
  86. Contribution
  87. Control
  88. Conviction
  89. Conviviality
  90. Coolness
  91. Cooperation
  92. Cordiality
  93. Correctness
  94. Country
  95. Courage
  96. Courtesy
  97. Craftiness
  98. Creativity
  99. Credibility
  100. Cunning
  101. Curiosity
  102. Daring
  103. Decisiveness
  104. Decorum
  105. Deference
  106. Delight
  107. Dependability
  108. Depth
  109. Desire
  110. Determination
  111. Devotion
  112. Devoutness
  113. Dexterity
  114. Dignity
  115. Diligence
  116. Direction
  117. Directness
  118. Discipline
  119. Discovery
  120. Discretion
  121. Diversity
  122. Dominance
  123. Dreaming
  124. Drive
  125. Duty
  126. Dynamism
  127. Eagerness
  128. Ease
  129. Economy
  130. Ecstasy
  131. Education
  132. Effectiveness
  133. Efficiency
  134. Elation
  135. Elegance
  136. Empathy
  137. Encouragement
  138. Endurance
  139. Energy
  140. Enjoyment
  141. Entertainment
  142. Enthusiasm
  143. Environmentalism
  144. Ethics
  145. Euphoria
  146. Excellence
  147. Excitement
  148. Exhilaration
  149. Expectancy
  150. Expediency
  151. Experience
  152. Expertise
  153. Exploration
  154. Expressiveness
  155. Extravagance
  156. Extroversion
  157. Exuberance
  158. Fairness
  159. Faith
  160. Fame
  161. Family
  162. Fascination
  163. Fashion
  164. Fearlessness
  165. Ferocity
  166. Fidelity
  167. Fierceness
  168. Financial independence
  169. Firmness
  170. Fitness
  171. Flexibility
  172. Flow
  173. Fluency
  174. Focus
  175. Fortitude
  176. Frankness
  177. Freedom
  178. Friendliness
  179. Friendship
  180. Frugality
  181. Fun
  182. Gallantry
  183. Generosity
  184. Gentility
  185. Giving
  186. Grace
  187. Gratitude
  188. Gregariousness
  189. Growth
  190. Guidance
  191. Happiness
  192. Harmony
  193. Health
  194. Heart
  195. Helpfulness
  196. Heroism
  197. Holiness
  198. Honesty
  199. Honor
  200. Hopefulness
  201. Hospitality
  202. Humility
  203. Humor
  204. Hygiene
  205. Imagination
  206. Impact
  207. Impartiality
  208. Independence
  209. Individuality
  210. Industry
  211. Influence
  212. Ingenuity
  213. Inquisitiveness
  214. Insightfulness
  215. Inspiration
  216. Integrity
  217. Intellect
  218. Intelligence
  219. Intensity
  220. Intimacy
  221. Intrepidness
  222. Introspection
  223. Introversion
  224. Intuition
  225. Intuitiveness
  226. Inventiveness
  227. Investing
  228. Involvement
  229. Joy
  230. Judiciousness
  231. Justice
  232. Keenness
  233. Kindness
  234. Knowledge
  235. Leadership
  236. Learning
  237. Liberation
  238. Liberty
  239. Lightness
  240. Liveliness
  241. Logic
  242. Longevity
  243. Love
  244. Loyalty
  245. Majesty
  246. Making a difference
  247. Marriage
  248. Mastery
  249. Maturity
  250. Meaning
  251. Meekness
  252. Mellowness
  253. Meticulousness
  254. Mindfulness
  255. Modesty
  256. Motivation
  257. Mysteriousness
  258. Nature
  259. Neatness
  260. Nerve
  261. Noncomformity
  262. Obedience
  263. Open-mindedness
  264. Openness
  265. Optimism
  266. Order
  267. Organization
  268. Originality
  269. Outdoors
  270. Outlandishness
  271. Outrageousness
  272. Partnership
  273. Patience
  274. Passion
  275. Peace
  276. Perceptiveness
  277. Perfection
  278. Perkiness
  279. Perseverance
  280. Persistence
  281. Persuasiveness
  282. Philanthropy
  283. Piety
  284. Playfulness
  285. Pleasantness
  286. Pleasure
  287. Poise
  288. Polish
  289. Popularity
  290. Potency
  291. Power
  292. Practicality
  293. Pragmatism
  294. Precision
  295. Preparedness
  296. Presence
  297. Pride
  298. Privacy
  299. Proactivity
  300. Professionalism
  301. Prosperity
  302. Prudence
  303. Punctuality
  304. Purity
  305. Rationality
  306. Realism
  307. Reason
  308. Reasonableness
  309. Recognition
  310. Recreation
  311. Refinement
  312. Reflection
  313. Relaxation
  314. Reliability
  315. Relief
  316. Religiousness
  317. Reputation
  318. Resilienceto get back in the saddle, to bounce back from a bad moment, to keep on going. If resilience is what you value, you may become very short-tempered with people who give up quickly or enjoy a good pity party. 
  319. Resolution
  320. Resolve
  321. Resourcefulness
  322. Respect
  323. Responsibility
  324. Rest
  325. Restraint
  326. Reverence
  327. Richness
  328. Rigor
  329. Sacredness
  330. Sacrifice
  331. Sagacity
  332. Saintliness
  333. Sanguinity
  334. Satisfaction
  335. Science
  336. Security
  337. Self-control
  338. Selflessness
  339. Self-reliance
  340. Self-respect
  341. Sensitivity
  342. Sensuality
  343. Serenity
  344. Service
  345. Sexiness
  346. Sexuality
  347. Sharing
  348. Shrewdness
  349. Significance
  350. Silence
  351. Silliness
  352. Simplicity
  353. Sincerity
  354. Skillfulness
  355. Solidarity
  356. Solitude
  357. Sophistication
  358. Soundness
  359. Speed
  360. Spirit
  361. Spirituality
  362. Spontaneity
  363. Spunk
  364. Stability
  365. Status
  366. Stealth
  367. Stillness
  368. Strength
  369. Structure
  370. Success
  371. Support
  372. Supremacy
  373. Surprise
  374. Sympathy
  375. Synergy
  376. Teaching
  377. Teamwork
  378. Temperance
  379. Thankfulness
  380. Thoroughness
  381. Thoughtfulnessthe act of being thoughtful means to pay attention to the details, to think things through before doing them, to plan with more discernment. If thoughtfulness is an important value to you then you may be very frustrated going to places and experiencing things that are rushed, unmannerly or discourteous. 
  382. Thrift
  383. Tidiness
  384. Timeliness
  385. Traditionalism
  386. Tranquility
  387. Transcendence
  388. Trust
  389. Trustworthiness
  390. TruthIf you value the truth, you expect people to be honest with you and you earn and build their trust by being 100% real with them. When and if someone lies to you, you will suffer, because you value honesty in a relationship, whether it be a professional or personal one.
  391. Understanding
  392. Unflappability
  393. Uniqueness
  394. Unity
  395. Usefulness
  396. Utility
  397. Valor
  398. Variety
  399. Victory
  400. Vigor
  401. Virtue
  402. Vision
  403. Vitality
  404. Vivacity
  405. Volunteering
  406. Warmheartedness
  407. Warmth
  408. Watchfulness
  409. Wealth
  410. Willfulness
  411. Willingness
  412. Winning
  413. Wisdom
  414. Wittiness
  415. Wonder
  416. Worthiness
  417. Youthfulness
  418. Zeal